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词汇表达灵活多样请继续保持，不过学术词汇的积累还有很大的空间；可适当增加从句和复杂句使用；文章采用了适当的过渡词和衔接词，结构比较严谨。
Travel never fails to fascinate us. It is the first option for a great mass of people whenever they have a vocation. Some people are attached to travel because not only can they take lots of pleasure from it, but they get to broaden their mind as well. Here are some benefits that travel could bring to us. First, so great is our passion for travelling, that we are becoming increasingly less narrow-minded. If a person live in a certain place for quite a long time and hardly leave there, then he will probably be an ignorant person, for he is nearly cut off from the outside. Next, the world is a book, and those who do not travel read only one page. Even perfect people did not have loads of life experience when they were born. Through travelling, you get an access to experience a variety of culture and knowledge. What’s more, we may harvest pure friendship during a little visit. You can just imagine that you savor the same view of beautiful scenery as the person sitting next to you does. And you must want to talk with someone rather than stay along silently at that time. Things go naturally then. I can’t resist concluding this article with a piece of advice: go for travel when you are free instead of just staying at home, and you may acquire a lot from this experience.
