2012年6月英语四级作文真题:过度包装的现象

文章结构不够严谨，应增加过程性词汇的使用；采用了一些简单的从句；文中能较熟练地使用一定的学术词汇，但词汇表达多样性不高，拼写检查还需加强；请提高文章内敛性，段落和句子要围绕主题展开。

On Excessive Packaging According to a recent survey,about 67.8% goods are on excessive packing,which causing a large pollution to do harm to our planet.The manufacturers weast the valuable resources to beauty their goods and then to add their money up.What the fool! In my oppinion,there are two reasons probobly explain the phnonmenon.On the one hand,the manufacturers what to earn more money and believe excessive packaging can reach their hope.On the other hand,consumers are willing to accept that beacuse they think its more noble. As for me,it's a weste to produce the goods on excessive packaging.Not only cause the peoblem of use,but do baddly effect for our world.We should solidify consistently, resist the excessive packaging. Any person,who is blind to this point,may pay a heavey price.