拼写做的很棒,学术词汇可适量增加;可适当增加长句和复杂句的使用;文章层次较为清晰。
With the prosperity of economy, Internet has become a great part of our life.Making friends online has also come into life of our generation.However,there is a deep-rooted concept that friends who are made online could cheat our money ,hurt our feelings .From this perspective ,many people come into this conclusion that it is unwise to make friends online.However ,the opinion which I want to convey is to call the readers see "making friends online" in a justice way. When we make friends through the Internet ,what we're most concerned about is the characteristic of the man sitting on the other side of the computer.Unfortunately we cannot look through that man in an exact way.And some bad people just use Internet to cheat us ,do many other bad things.Many people have been cheated or seen the news about such things and they just don't belive the friendship which begins from Internet.But please hold on, have you ever think about that the man who is speaking to you through Internet may also want a true friendship just like you do?Or he has just lost his best friends and need your help? So please don't refuse him. So here comes the conclusion,have a sound attitude towards this matter.Keep cautious when you communicate with him.Pay attention not to be cheaten by bad person.
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