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作者词汇量积累不错，学术词汇积累较少；文章在句法方面做的很棒，从句和复杂句的使用不错；文章层次不够分明，缺少组织，需注意文章整体的组织结构；请注意分段。
A severe snow storm hit South China around the Spring Festival , keeping many people from returning home. Yet different kinds of help were offered to help them the hard time. This reminds me of my experience, which I am quite proud of. On May 12, an earthquake, the worst and largest in the history of China since liberation, hit Wenchuan county, Sichuan Province, causing thousands of deaths and severe destruction. Hearing about the news, I decided to do as much as I can to help the local people. I told my classmates about it and then we decided to promote a donation activity among our school. Teamed up with others from the Students’ Union , we put up a notice telling everyone about it. The news spread quickly. The next morning, all the students in our school joined us. Not only did they donate clothes, but also the money they saved. Even our teachers spoke highly of what we did and supported us by donating a lot of their money for the people in Sichuan with the hope that it could help them out. I am proud of what I did. As a middle school student, I think I am more than willing to give a hand to those in trouble. I can help my classmates with their school work; I can help the blind cross the street ; I can give my seat to the elderly. Helping others is a virtue. Only when everyone is always ready to offer help will our world become more harmonious.
