4. 文具方面。
拼写很棒,可适当增加学术词汇的使用;文中衔接词和过渡词使用的很棒;丰富从句的使用,文章会更出色;请注意分段。
Dear classmates, Chairman Hu called on the whole society to build China into a saving country last year. As a student, I think that we should set a good example to our parents and friends in this action. First, there is no doubt that students should try their best to save money spending on cloths and snacks. In my personal opinion, paying too much attentions to cloths not only waste money and time but also makes us indicated into spending. What's more, water and energy existed in our earth is limited, if we used water and energy without rule, water and energy would cause a big headache for next generation. In the end, I called all students to make contributes to build China into a saving country.