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行文稍显不流畅，应增加文中衔接词的使用；句法知识扎实，但需注意文中个别句子错误；文中能较熟练地使用一定的学术词汇，但词汇表达多样性不高，拼写检查还需加强。
a major disadvantage of advertise on television Nowsday, as the media murtuty more people chose the tv to show there comdity or creative for us. In fact, show advertise on tv may be has some advantages,but it has more disadvantage. The show of advertise on tv would distriub people watch tv interest and make people fury their show even hate it. And it has potiest danger if you invenment money or time but without affect. And then if you have a good idea, dommodity or something is very well, so you doesn't to make a show. So you should go different way!
