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文中词汇表达比较多样，能多用学术词汇就更好了；文中应增加从句和复合句的使用；过渡词和衔接词使用不恰当，缺少组织，可适当增加连接词的使用。
Love is a lamp In the picture , an oil lamp gives out bright flame against the dark background .The oil lamp here is symbol of love . Just as is said in the picture , love is a lamp ;The darker the background is ,the brighter it looks . It is true that the harder the situation is ,the more valuable love is. Lots of examples might be easily given . For example , when someone is starving to death, just a little food and water may save his or her life .When a little girl in a poor area drops out of school , just a small sum of money from you may support her to finish school and change her life. In a word, we should offer our help to the persons in need . I believe that if every one of us can give love to others, the relationship between people will harmonious and our society will be a better place for us to live in.
