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作者词汇表达恰当，同时能较灵活地使用学术词汇；可适当增加文中长句和复杂句的使用；行文稍显不流畅，应增加文中衔接词的使用。
The Benefits of Volunteering It has been a tradition for Chinese to help others since ancient times. Nowadays, tens of millions of volunteers from all over the world try their best to assist those in need. It was reported that China now has 4.5 million registered volunteers having spent no less than 4.5 billion hours to do volunteer work. There is no denying that volunteering will benefit us a lot. Here, I'd like to list three most significant advantages. First of all,by taking part in volunteer work, we can build our personalities such as receiving the sense of achievement and confidence. Since volunteering is related to our interests, we will feel easy and get a lot of fun from it. After volunteering, there is no doubt that we will bring this attitude toward life and work, so that we'll finish all our work effectively. Besides that, we can expand our social circles for that we may get in touch with people from all levels during being a volunteer. It is a good opportunity to make more friends and broaden our horizon. In addition, volunteering to help others is essential for us to be healthy. A research indicates that people doing volunteer work will live longer than others. Through helping others, we can make our life more abundant and keep a good mood every day. Being a volunteer is pretty glorious, only by helping those in need can we become confident, expand our social circles, and be in good health.
