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作者词汇表达灵活丰富，希望学术词汇的使用能更熟练；可适当增加从句和复杂句使用；全文结构较为严谨，应适当增加文中衔接词的使用。
With an increasing number of college students graduating from the universities, more and more people gradually doubt the quality of the graduated students. In this material-oriented society, a wide range of affiliations mix into the education. Students who are studying in university realize that they havr already succeed and superior than others. Addiction in the internet games, concertration on their girlfriends and even lacking of classes, have become a common phenomenon, which lead to various worse qualities. A university student, that is a talented and knowledgable student, will play a significant role in a county. Therefore, hardworking or endeavor comes into the first quality of education. As a student, whether you dedicate to your learning determine whether you achieve success in the future or not. If a student takes university certification as their ending of education for granted, they must be failure and vice versa. What's more, honest is another valuable quality to a graduated student. Nowadays, a variety of cheating advertisements and companies enable the society to fill with dissatisfaction and disappointment. When a employer assesses their interviewees, honest is certainly considered. Thus, it is a major element for university students. Furthermore, responsibility is also supposed to be an indispensable quality. Couraging to take responsibility represents that a person will have confidence to undertake mistakes and can correct them immediately. A student with a sense of responsibility is a credible person. Recently, a growing number of people neglect it and even attempt to avoid it. For instance, when people see an old people fall down the street, they prefer to escape rather than call an ambulance. It is a terrible scene to the human beings. All in all, as a high-educated students, effort, honest and responsibility are a necessary qulities. With these preeminent merits, college students are able to devote to their power so that they can do what they want to and realize what they want to reach.
