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文中词汇表达较丰富恰当，但学术词汇稍显不足；作者句法知识很棒，适当增加从句的使用，会取得更不错的成绩；文章层次不够分明，缺少组织，需注意文章整体的组织结构。
Now,the smog makes nearly all of the people coughing and unwell. Scientists look though the smog, then they are so surprise at the detection result. People who agree to go out by car believe it doesn't make the smog. They think that the car is comfortable and fast, so it's a good vehicle for the people.If you want to buy some vegetables,you just need five minutes by car,it's much faster than walk! In the end, they say that the car is so good,and the walking is so evil.When we walk, our legs are sour and uncomfortable. Let's listen to the other side. We believe drive not only destroy the air, but hurt ourselves as well.If the people had realized it isn't healthy, they would haven't drive cars. However, they only found its advantages,because they didn't know environment, pollution, smog and so on. We had to do more things for all of us after we had damaged the environment. And the smog will make the atmospheric pollution and global warming. In the future, the organic power will replace the gasoline. We do as good as possible for our sick world. Less driving, more walking will let our future better and better.
