作者词汇表达丰富度要继续提升,学术词汇使用过少;简单句比重过高,另应加强复杂句的练习;建议在衔接词汇方面加强积累;请注意分段;连词使用偏少。
Welcome to our club There are many activities in our club.Our club is about sports.It holds on the basketball,football,baseball game and so on.If you join us.We will schedule the time to go on sports.If you do everything,you will get a healthy body.You will be strong.If you build up every day,you never go to hospital. Fellow student that meet the requirements and want to join in the sports club.Please call us at 6543210 or sent an email to sports@163.com.