采用了恰当的衔接手法,层次清晰;熟练的采用了一些从句;文中用词稍显贫乏,同时请注意单词拼写的检查;请注意分段;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开。
i think that the failure is the mother of sucess,because only get failure ,we can realize what we are wrong and from which we can impove ourselves step by step .let's look these successful people they have got failure many times .so don't be sad when you are in failure.