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文中词汇表达比较多样，能多用学术词汇就更好了；可适当增加长句和复杂句的使用；上下文衔接不流畅，文章结构不严谨。
Actions speak louder than words . As we all know ,the number of shopping online is increasing quickly. Online shopping has become a fashion and it is popular among younger and old persons nowadays . Why online shopping is so interested in persons ? Everything has two sides ,besides online shopping. According to many surveys , it has so many advantages ,however it has many disadvantages either . Because of shopping online ,we can buy things at home without going to shops.And many things are much cheaper online than on shops or supermarkets .If we are busying ,shopping online enable us to get more time to our work or family ,it is so save time .In conclusion ,shopping online is so convenient that many people are like it.One of the biggest problem is we were become more and more lazy if we always shopping online . As my view ,i think shopping online is so convenient and i like shopping online very much.
