题目:Computer and Man人与电脑
字数:150满分:100分
请作者增加学术词汇的使用,单词拼写做的很好;文章在句法方面做的很棒,从句和复杂句的使用不错;文章结构不够严谨,应增加过程性词汇的使用。
In new semester, we meet our classmates and friends again in school. Going out to travel is a good choice for the sake of the joy of reunion, therefore we planed to travel in some places. Last mouth, the classmates in the department decided to Dehua County which is also called the capital of porcelain. In that day, we spent more than three hours to the first spot, Niutoushan, and walked along a long path to climb the mountain. Owing to the rain the day before, the waterfall of water is much and looks extremely spectacular. When we arrived the end of the road we absolutely approach to the waterfall, the water hit our body and the wind blow to us that made me completely wet. We went to the Taoci Street in the evening. There are many shops which all sorts of tea sets were shown. I was curious about the culture of tea in Fujian when I viewed these tea sets. On the following day, we visited the porcelain factory that a row of crude porcelain displays on the shelf, and a number of workers were processing. In order to satisfy the curiosity we also brought some mud to study how to make, and late I made a cup. In April, my roommates and I went to Yunshuiyao in Nanjing. We knew the wonderful place through watching a movie named《云水谣》,and we were touched by Biyun and Qiushui’s great love. Although we spent six hours in taking a coach, I think everything we did is worthy when we saw the beautiful scenery. The green brook and the terraced fields planted with tea looks very nice. HuaiYuanLou and YuanGuiLou look ancient but there still some people live in here. We all liked to eat the local food that tastes intensely delicious. In the evening we got together to play card and drunk wine. Until felt a bit of tipsy, we sat on the terrace blowing and chatting. What a pleasant day. As a saying goes, traveling thousands of miles is better than reading thousands of books. Travel with friends not only enhances the feelings between friends, but above all it obtains the knowledge what can't learn from books. I have more new understanding of culture in Fujian.