作者词汇表达较为熟练,学术词汇使用不是很多;可适当增加从句使用,注意极个别句子错误;全文结构较为严谨,应适当增加文中衔接词的使用。
On Excessive Packaging As we are shopping in the center,we can see many things on sale are so beautiful and colorful .In other words,they are over packed. But how could they be this?Mostly because those things are send as gifts,with such a nice gift,we can feel satisfied and proud.And the businessmen make full use of this kind of feelings so that things are becoming more and more over weight. As for me,I think it is useless to do that.If we want to send gift to someone,it is you sincere heat on the gift matters not the overlook .Our world has been hurt so mach,we should not wast so much resources any more.Thus we should appeal to everyone to stopping produce and buy those things on excessive packaging.