作者句法知识很棒,适当增加从句的使用,会取得更不错的成绩;作者能较多样的使用词汇表达,但要注意词汇拼写的检查;衔接成分太少,文章结构欠佳。
My favorite sport I like many kinds of sports and my favorite sport is playing football.I always play football with my classmates everyday after school.I often don't go home until I am extremely exhausded.I love football just by chance.On one day my way home,I picked up a football which somebody lost.And then I played with my fridens,which gave me a lot of fun.From that moment on,I deeply fell in love with this kind of sport----football. The second day I went to school,I joined the football club and played with classmates everyday.After a few months' training ,my teamates and I took part in the city football game and got the first name.On that day , we sang and danced to celebrate our success. This experience gave me much more confidence to become a professional football player in the future.I wanted be a man like the England football star Beiker Ham who is my favorite player.I always watch the matches he takes part in and learn a lot from him.I have told my parents that my dream is to be a professional football play and they compeltely support me and encourage me to do my best to achieve my dream.This made me more firm.I believe that I will realise my dream through my hard work.