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作者词汇表达较多样灵活，也能较准确地使用学术词汇；可适当增加从句和复杂句使用；衔接成分太少，文章结构欠佳。
As is depicted in the chart,the time that students spend on computers increases much than ever before.The phenomenon attracts much attention and people's opinions vary from one to anther. Many reasons are responsible for the phenomenon.For one thing,with the development of technology and economics,the traditional tools is hard to meet the requirements of the science and technology.By comparison,computers are extremely useful devices which can be implied to any fields imaginable.For another,computers are too expensive for many individuals to purchase ten years before.But now people can have pcs because it is cheaper than ever and an increasing number of individuals have the ability to afford for a personal computer.What's more,the functions of the computers is irreplaceable.Some problems which is difficult for us to cope with can be easily solved by the computer. As for me,there are still some issues that need to be done.First,the internet is a mixture of benefits and evils.So we should learn to tell the advantages from the disadvantages and absorb what is good for us.Second,some students are indulged in computer games which do great harm to their physical and psycological health.What's more,more potential harm is waiting for us to discover.
