作者词汇表达较为熟练,学术词汇使用不是很多;作者句法知识很棒,适当增加从句的使用,会取得更不错的成绩;全文结构较为严谨,应适当增加文中衔接词的使用;请注意分段。
As everyone knows, People can get much information through the Internet. Meanwhile, people are also clearly aware of its disadvantages, but some children don’t realize they sometimes make friends with bad people online. In my opinion, people can use the Internet to make friends, download useful materials and go shopping online. It’s really very helpful. However, there are also many disadvantages about the Internet. If you can’t use it correctly, it may be harmful to you. In junior middle school, I was once crazy about playing online games and I counldn’t control myself. As a result, my study results were getting from bad to worse. Besides, if you believe whatever your friends say online, you will be cheated by them some day, I think.