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文章词汇表达丰富，学术词汇积累做的也很棒；作者有一定功底，可在平时练习中增加长难句的记忆；行文稍显不流畅，应增加文中衔接词的使用。
It is universally acknowledged that extracurricular activities play a significant part in school life .some students advocate that it can contribute directly to their health .while others who contend the opinion that extracurricular activities are futile ,which they think may waste time. there is probably some truth in both statements,but as far as i am concerned ,freshmen's learning task is relatively easy,so we can take in the appropriate activities. with students 's perceptions changed ,they gradually deem that extracurricular activities are conductive to their life and health ,which make them have a strong desire to take part in it .Taking part in those activities contribute directly to our physically and mentally health .In addition ,it also improve our personal relationship . Besides ,we have the capacity to obtain many kinds of practical skills and useful knowledge ,which may put us in a beneficial position in the future job markets.study hard as we must do,but just as the saying goes that All work no play makes jack a dull boy . From what we have discussed above ,we may deduce that we should take part in appropriate activities in college.
