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可适当增加从句和复杂句使用；恰当的使用了过渡词和衔接词，衔接手法做的很棒；词汇表达灵活多样请继续保持，学术词汇的使用还有很大提升空间。
It was widely reported that many species of wildlife have been disappeared or extinct in past 100 years, which exceeds the rate within the past 2000 years. Some think the situation is so serious that we already have no chance to recover it. But others insist that we are supposed to take actions to change it even though the situation is not optimistic. In my point of view, I am firmly for the latter. There's a proverb, " Better late than never". But compared with the age of dinosaur extinction, today's situation is not that bad. We still have a lot of things to do before the thing goes much worse. To begin with, based on researchers' investigation, forest deforsation caused forest acreage sharply decrease and inhabitation of wildlife was seriously affected. Then, human's hunting is another human's behavior to kill those innocent creatures, especially in Cantoon province in China, many people eat precious animals to satisfy their appitite. I really hate this kind of phenomenon and this should be forbidden. Futhermore, environment pollutions lead to climate changes which some species hardly adapt. For example, with the temperature getting warmer, the number of polar bears dropped a lot. Finally, I suppose that the government should play vital role to improve the environment and meanwhile make a very strict law to punish those people who indiscriminate destoration, hunting and eating animals. And people also need to take account of their next generation.
