可以适当增加细节,使行文连贯。
My father
_________
希望作者可以加强词汇表达多样性,尤其是学术词汇的积累;但从句使用不熟练,注意平时练习中多积累;层次不清晰,几乎没有使用衔接词;请注意分段。
My father My father is a 40-year-old math teacher . He is tall and fat with short hair and big eyes . He always works hard . His classes are lively and interesting and deeply loved by his students . My father is an honest and kind man . He often helps other children and me with our maths. My father' s hobby is playing table tennis . We often play table tennis together at the weekends . My father is not only a good father but also a good friend . I have learned a lot from him . I love my father very much .