文中词汇表达不够丰富,要多积累学术词汇;文中有几处错误的句子,部分句子偏简单;层次不清晰,几乎没有使用衔接词;请注意分段。
When I grow up。I want to be a teacher.Because teacher can help too much people student much culture.In the feature, the people need student culture.Because the people need culture help them to do work.In the now,l has to hard student culture.My teacher tells me student culture can help too much people.So the teacher often help me student more than culture.In the feature, I believe me is a good teacher.