请作者增加词汇表达的丰富度,对拼写检查也要重视;句式变化不明显,另外要多多加强从句在文中的比例;不能熟练使用过渡词,文章结构欠佳;连词使用偏少。
Hi ,I am a football fans,play football is my biggest hobby.By chance let me fall in love with play football. On the way home i found a football,then play this ball with my friends.so i love play football,later. I always practice and play games with my classmates. My favorite football start is Beckham in Enland,my biggist is become a professional football player