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文中词汇使用较丰富，学术词汇使用要加强；作者句法不错，但是文章整体句子稍微偏短；行文稍显不流畅，应增加文中衔接词的使用。
Everyone in this world will face to obstacles.It is as natural as breath. So,needless to say,if happiness is because of the absence of problems,then no one will be happy. In my opinion,dealing with problems bravely is the true way leading to happiness. For example,most of men today want to leave home and start their own business career . Then don't afraid of facing to problems.On the contrary,they want to deal with these problems by themselves. They feel happy when they got sense of achievement. If they only live under the shelter,they will never know the taste of happiness.Life will just like water which made them feel tedious. As to develop our ability to deal with problems,I think,wisdom as well as braveness are the most important. On the one hand, wisdom is the key to deal with the problems.Without wisdom,all efforts were wasted. On another hand, do what you think is right bravely.Don't be afraid of failure.Remember the old saying:where there is a will there is a way!
