文章词汇表达比较灵活,学术词汇的使用要继续加强;文中句子偏简单,可增加从句使用量;文章结构不够严谨,应增加过程性词汇的使用。
A foreign friend of mine is going to visit my hometown. At first,I come from Xi'an,but I'm a county.In my opinion you must be visiting the BingmaYong and HuaShan,all over the word.But the HuaShan is dangerous.If you want to going there should be carefully or together with other's.Because of I wish you have a good trip.You can living my home.We will plain the trip,together.And if you need something,you must tell me,I will ask you anything,about the city.Have a good trip to Xi'an. The last,welcome to Xi'an.I hope you coming,next time.