拼写很棒,可适当增加学术词汇的使用;句式灵活多变,但文中句子错误偏多了;文章结构严谨,有效地使用了语句间的衔接成分。
Travel can broaden people's mind Today for people's life have already reached a higher level,more and more people start to traveling around the world,travel would bring lots of benefit for people,even it would benefit for their lifetime. The first of all, when you are traveling,you will feel pleasant and relax,even you will find everything is fine in the world,it would bring a certain benefit for your health,because when you are happy,you would relieve fall ill. Secondly,the travel is not only broaden our view,but we can understand local people's convention as well,every country's convention is different,they would bring lots of fun,also,we can learn their language,that must be very exciting,in addition,we can understand their culture and history,that is very important,we would realize some sense in it. So,people should spare some time to travel every year,sometimes you would gain harvest accidentally.