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作者学术词汇使用比较准确，词汇表达较丰富，但仍需增加词汇积累；句法知识很棒，若增加一些从句的使用，文章会更出色；衔接成分太少，文章结构欠佳。
From the graphic we can easily know that students use of computers plays an increasingly important role in their life.Nearly the computer becomes a must for students.From where I stand,there are 3 possible factors influencing the phenomenon. The most vital motivation to encourage its widespread use is its multiusefulness of computer.For example,students can search much information on line and learn on line. With the rapid development of science technology,it becomes more and more useful.What's more,to a degree,students can afford it with lower price than it was.The last but not least,it is to keep pace with the development of society that students are required to master the computer. However,the use of computer maybe not only distracts students' attention but affects their study.Students are liable to be induced by the massive temptation on line,which is bad for them.Only when they make use of the computer with a limitation can they benefit much from it. In my opinion,students should not use computer excessively.They had better regulate the time limitation when using computer.
