拼写很棒,可适当增加学术词汇的使用;若注意一些语法错误,文章会更漂亮;全文结构较为严谨,应适当增加文中衔接词的使用。
My views on online-shopping In the modern world, online-shopping has been became more and more popular and it even became a fashionable ways. More importantly is that when we are shopping online we can have so many kinds of goods to be chosen by us. Furthermore, we can cost less money to go shopping in internet as well as can convenient for we just need use our fingers to pressing code we can get we want it. But on the contrary, selecting online-shopping doesn't accomplish everything that we want. Such as, ice cream, cars and so on. What's more, looking something on internet always have a lot of differences for our receive the goods. For this we see, online-shopping has its advantages and disadvantages. We need to learn what do we real needed and then by a correct way to buying things. Therefore, we can get a happy experience of going shopping on internet.