拼写很棒,可适当增加学术词汇的使用;增加一些从句的使用,文章会更不错;连接词过少,建议增加衔接词汇的积累;连词使用偏少;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开;可以适当增加副词的使用。
From: Tomsmith@hotmail.com To: John@163.com Date: June 20th I'm general manager of sales department of Fox Electronic Comply. To enhance our cooperation, I wish that we can discuss certain things on some day. The detailed date is June 20th. New products and Ads activities should be deeply discussed. We suggest that we can establish a permanent relationship. Best Wishes Tom Smith