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作者能较熟练、灵活地使用词汇，建议要多使用学术词汇；能够使用一些简单的从句；文章结构不够严谨，应增加过程性词汇的使用。
How Should Parents Help Children to Be Independent？ In many family,children became the center of parents.The population policy of county and some thingking of education that made children gain too love to independent.In daily life,we usually see parents do alomst everything for their children without complain,such as,wash clothes,tidy up the room,give some money to buy everything… In parents＇s opinion,it is the best method to express their love.But in fact,it is a disaster of children＇future.Once they leave their parents,they can't take good care of themselves. So parent should give more chance to let children have a try on everything.In daily life,parents should tell children how to cook,how to clean and how to keep healthy… On the other,give some opportunity to children that they can deal with some difficult on study and the relationship with others. In a word,parents should make children with awareness that"No pains,no gains.Depedent yourself all the time.''
