增加一些从句的使用,文章会更不错;文中有较多拼写错误,请作者增加词汇量的积累;语言不流畅;连词使用偏少;请注意分段。
i have a good new teacher, hei name is lily.she is beautiful .she has long black hair ,two big eyes and ared mouth .she is good to us .she often help me when i in trouble .she is good at singsoing and dance .her lessons is very interesting to us . i still remember her sweet smiling when she face us.