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作者能较熟练、灵活地使用词汇，建议要多使用学术词汇；从句数量偏少；语言不流畅；连词使用偏少。
as we all know,friends play a very important role in our life ,without them , our life will not be so wonderful. to be honest,Ｉwas not an outgoing girl before .my only response to the teacher's questions was blowing my head in class. things have changed since that summer. my good friends encouraged me to show myself bravely and built up my confidence.with the help of whom,Ｉ become more confident about myself and have a better command of knowledge because of my active behavier in class. thanks to my good friends'enourage,Ｉcan overcome my weakness easily.
