3.词数80左右。开头已给出,不计入总词数。
作者词汇量偏少,但单词拼写做的不错;可适当增加从句和长句的使用;语言不流畅;连词使用偏少;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开。
Jeremy Shu-How Lin was born on 23 August,1988.He is a American who have 191 cm tall and 91 kg.He study hard when he was a student.And finally,he graduated from Harvard university. He not only have a clever mind but also training hard. He becomes the first NBA player who graduated from Harvard university. I think everybody is supposed to study from Jeremy Shu-How Lin in order to achieve our dreams.I think that if we want to do,we can do everything well.