可适当增加文中长句和复杂句的使用;文中词汇表达用的较灵活,同时能够较恰当地使用学术词汇;语言不流畅;连词使用偏少。
Nowadays,so many people are glad to join in volunteer group and to help those in needs.And it is not hard to discover that our world is changed a lot because of them.I think volunteering can bring a lot of benefits to us,so I am very appreciate this organization. As far as I am concerned,people can take many advantages from volunteering.Here are some of my thoughts about it.First,as a college student,being a voulnteer is an effective way to improve themselves and build a good character,which contributes to reach their dreams in the future.Second,volunteering will be very useful to model for peopel,it is a guide for people to have a correct value.Third,volunteering can weaken some conflicts that exist for a long time.So it's good to create a good social environment,and achieve the dreams of society. In brief,volunteering have a great influence on the world,it will never out of time.And people's live will be more and more better if all of us can join in the group.