可适当增加从句的使用;文中拼写错误比较多,用词也稍显贫乏;语言不流畅;连词使用偏少;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开;请注意分段。
23,December,2008 sale-department@hotmail.com Mr.Johnson: we are receive your company producted 30000 in 22,December.According to our siging of the No.35 order,the quanity should be 3500,then,we not get to 5000 piece at present.Please check your product list. tank your surpport thank you we are looking forward to your early replay! Yours wanghiayang wanghaiyang@hotmail.com