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作者词汇表达比较灵活多变，尤其是学术词汇使用较恰当；可适当增加复合句和从句的使用；语言不流畅；连词使用偏少。
Currently,we are living a society overwhelmed by pressure,which cause a phenomenon that an increasing number of people become victims to stress and many of them choose to suicide under pressure.Therefore,someone propose a question:how to keep psychological health?In view of this,i contribute some suggestions to answer this question. Firstly,it's commonly acknowledged that mental health is far more important than wealth.A majority of people,however, overlook the significance of mental health.Therefore,the key to keep psychologically healthy is that doing more exercise as many as possible.What's more,the reason why i say is that not only it can keep our body strong,but also can contribute to alleviate the stress.Secondly,a great number of people choose to suicide to end their life under pressure.So the other way to protect you from pressure is travelling.An advantage of travelling is that,Admittedly, it can release our stress as it enables us to enjoy ourselves in the journey such as experiencing many of interests,tasting a variety of food etc.What's more, we can devote ourselves to work after a journey. Taking above two suggestions into consideration,we may draw the conclusion that doing exercise and travelling can be a good approach to keep mental health.And i believe that if we can bear the suggestion in mind,our life will be better.
