可适当增加复杂句和从句的使用;文中词汇表达多样性要加强,但请仔细检查词汇的拼写;语言不流畅;连词使用偏少。
People always influence by others. what we see and what we heard not always real.we have to choose the right opion to listen. nowadays, we are freedom,so we can talk what we want . in my opion, when we heard some news that we don't know it truth or not , we must have our owe mind. do not follow the others .we heve calm down and analy the whole thing. see what i see ,listen what i lisen and immediatly make descion is not intelligece. you have to believe this: we must have our own mind , do the right choice ,do the right thing. we can't lose our mind to trust whatever people say . the real thing would not barried in people's talk .
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