希望作者可以加强词汇表达多样性,尤其是学术词汇的积累;正确句子比例较高,适当增加复杂句的使用,文章会更出色;层次不清晰,几乎没有使用衔接词。
Tina will go to BeiJing.She wants to see the Great Wall and other beautiful sights.Because she thinks China is a rich and colorful national,she likes BeiJing.And she will in a beautiful place to have fun. But Jim has a strange idea.He didn't want to go anywhere.He wants to stay at home.Because he thinks travel is tired.And stay at home will have a good rest. Though have mach homework, I want to go to Tibet.Because there are stretch as far as the eye can see grassland and gathering in crowds and groups of cattle and sheep.I think it's very beautiful. Where are you want to go?