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恰当的使用了过渡词和衔接词，衔接手法做的很棒；能够使用一些不错的从句；文章用了较为丰富的词汇，高级词汇略显单薄，同时注意单词拼写的检查。
When I get the information that you are going to take a vacation in my hometown,I am happy. As we all know ,there are many famous place of interest in China.At the monment you get there ,I will go to the river named Nandu with you,which is the most beautiful place of my hometown . A gerat many people come to here to spend their holiday for its clean air as well as the beautiful view. It symbolizes the life and hope .In my hometown, the people who is making their life depending an it,regards it as their mother,and pretents it from pollution.It is the people lived next to it that it still can be clean. Along it ,not only can you enjoy the sun ,but also you can relax youself. In my opinion ,I am sure you will like this wonderful experience,and I assure you that this trip will be of great fun.
