文中词汇表达比较多样,能多用高级词汇就更好了;若加强一些复杂句和从句的使用,文章会更棒;采用了简单的衔接手法,行文流畅。
The important person in my life is my classmate Bob,he is a friendly and kind person. Two month ago,I was always the last one in 1000 metres race,and just wanted to give up.Nevertheless,my best friend Bob,helped me.He ran along with me and encouraged me.What's more,once he said"You just only lose if you give up".Out of question these words make a difference on me.After that,I began to run every morning and had a lot of promotion. Maybe he isn’t pretty, wise or rich, but there’s no doubt that he is the most important person in my life,so I want to be a person like him.