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作者词汇表达丰富度要继续提升，高级词汇使用过少；行文较为流畅，作者文中过渡词使用的不错；如若增加一些长难句的使用，会为文章添彩。
When we come to this world,when we have life,we will face to everything and we should do something to make our life become significant. What are significative things? People often say, knowledge is power. So we should learn, to improve our thought, to enlarge this world people had known. We also use knowledge to create wealth. In addition to this, we should go out to see this word. There was a well-known saying "The world is very large, I want to see".We should travel, make some good friends, have a happy family.
