文中词汇表达比较多样,能多用学术词汇就更好了;作者句法不错,但是文章整体句子稍微偏短;文章层次不够分明,缺少组织,需注意文章整体的组织结构;请注意分段。
This afternoon a charity sale was held on the playground in our school.Its purpose was very helpful.When you buy a new book here,It will bring a new book to a child who lives in a poor area at the same time.So most students and teachers take an active part in this activity.The children who lives some poor areas need more chances to get educations.It said that books are bridges to knowledge.If a child in poor areas can receive a better education and get more knowledge.I believe their lives will be greatly improved!