可适当增加从句的使用,注意文中的一些小错误;作者平时练习中应扩充词汇量,注意几处拼写错误;层次不清晰,几乎没有使用衔接词。
In order to deal with the climate change, the United Nations held the 15th Climate Change Conference in Copenhagen from Dec.18, 2009. In the conference,they discussed the problems that are bad for our life.For exemple, emitting lots of polluted air is influencing the tempurature. And they gave some oppinions to solve the problems.For instance,the developed countries should ensure to decrease the greenhouse gas.In addition,Chinese ensured we would take part in the activity. In my oppinion , protect the earth needs everyone . So,we should try our best to protect the environment.