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作者词汇基础不错，在学术词汇的积累上还要再接再厉；句式变化较为明显，可适当增加从句的使用；文章层次较为清晰。
All of us are kept being taught to be strong and always cherish a strong will in mind no matter what we do since we born. But how many of us know exactly what strong will is? Well, from my perspective, strong will is one’s the strength originates from the very deep heart that can drive us to strive persistently to our ambitions, without which no accomplishments can be made. Strong will is the important and premise of success. The process to our success is a road stretching long, with stumbling blocks and poisonous plants everywhere. It’s only the strong will of reaching our final destination that can arouse the courage and strength we need to overcome all these barriers. Famous inventor Einstein once said, genius is 99 percent of hard work and 1 percent of natural aptitude. In fact, there is always strong will to support you fight for your goal. Only people with strong will can accomplish significant tasks. From those astronomers, scientists, and famous artists, we can all find strong will inside them. I will mention Schwarzenegger for example. Before he became the movie star in Hollywood, no one had ever thought that he could be so successful in movie industry for his appearance and body frame weren’t good enough to be an actor. However, it was the strong will inside his heart that supported him to strive with all his effort to improve himself in possessing all the features of actors. Finally, he became the No1 movie star in Hollywood, which was not a coincidence at all. Strong will is not the virtue that special for famous people, but the basic quality that all of us should possess. As for our students, strong will is the premise of studying well and getting good grades. Without working hard in period of schooling, never will we be useful citizens when we step into society. In a word, strong will is a necessary quality that enables us to the final success.
