简单句比重太高了;作者词汇量偏小,另外文章有些单词拼写错误;全文结构不够严谨,文中很少使用衔接词和过渡词;连词使用偏少;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开。
My new teacher. Recently there is a fresh teacher. I heard that her name is kelly. She is twenty,how young she is. Starting from today she will work at our school. She is very beatuful. Especially eyes and mouth. Her eyes are very black. Her mouth is very small. My classmate Rita said she likes cooking. I asked Rita that why she know this. Rita told me that kelly is her aunt. That's wonderful.