文中词汇表达比较多样,能多用高级词汇就更好了;作者句法知识很棒,适当增加从句的使用,会取得更不错的成绩;全文结构较为严谨。
As the saying goes,“money is not mighty,but without money we can not live.”It means the importance of money,but it cannot stand for that we must earn money by all means.We should make money with our hands. For one thing,money can buy everything we love and our needs can be meet.For another thing,if we just have wealth,we can also not live a happy life.For instance,a person has a big house with expensive furniture,Hower,there is no family accompanying him.How pitiful it is! In my opinion,money is for living happily,we can use it to fulfill our wants.Whereas,we can be grasped by money.That is to say,more money is not more fun.In the meantime,only making money by ourselves can we feel comfortable.
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