题目:Computer and Man人与电脑
字数:150满分:100分
文章结构清晰,有效地采用了多种衔接方法;句式变化多样;请作者增加词汇表达的丰富度,且检查文中的拼写错误。
Computer and Man As the computer going into our lives,not only when people are working but also during the people spare time,computer is necessary. computer has changed the way we live,makes it more convenient and more effective. But at the same time,the increasing use of computer makes people get sick more easily,and looking at the scrine of the computer does no good to our eyes.the long times useing of computer makes people nervous and inpatinent. So we must make sure that computer can be used to make our working and life more convenient,nevertheless we also have to keep the time useing computer, so that we can have a good health and make a good use of it as well.