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文章词汇表达要更加熟练，希望能更多使用一些高级词汇；作者句法基础不错，可适当增加复杂句的使用；采用了简单的衔接手法，行文流畅。
If my foreign friend is going to visit my hometown,I will take him to the most attracted place in Chongqing.If you ever went to Chongqing,the most beautiful place is Jiefangbei,it is a place that assembled commercial and financial from all over the world.There is a place in which most local people will chose to relax and shop on holiday.I want to recommend you to celebrate the New Year with three hundred people in the square of Jiefangbei on the last day of December every year.It is a traditional way to celebrate the New Year coming in Chongqing. In the last day of this year,hundreds and thousands of people gathered to hear the Big Clock sounds.So,if you really want to visit Chongqing,you can not miss it.
