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语句间的衔接成分用的不错，同时文章中的过程性词汇很丰富；作者句法知识较为扎实，可增加复合句和从句使用；文中词汇表达灵活多样，高级词汇的使用还需加强。
In my pespective, dialects are not as acceptable in public places as Putonghua, not only because those who speak the same dialects are just the minority, but also for this behavior shows inrespect to the others. Take my daily school life for example. Dialects are not permitted in all the academic classes for we come from various parts of China and each one has his own dialect. What a horrible mess will it be if everyone only talk in their dialect? Besides, during our communication, none of us will speak diclects considering others' feelings. On weekend, in the subway, sometimes I will hear some passengers chatting in dialects, though it does not trouble me, I feel a little frustrated. Many of my classmates have the same feeling with me that we realize we are not the local peole when we hear someone speak dialects. As is showed above, I believe dialects are not that acceptable for its limited user ranges and unfriendly sign. When we appeal that dialects should be well preserved we'd better use standard language in public at the same time.
