简单句型过多,从句使用不熟练;作者能较熟练、灵活地使用词汇,建议要多使用高级词汇;文章层次较为清晰;
My hometown is KaiFeng,an ancient city of China.I Konw my foreign friend is interested in Chinese culture.As the host,I must make the guest be enjoying. Firstly to speaking,Iwill show the delicious food in KaiFeng 's nights.Frankly,it is crowd because it's be known for all the mans in China.In addition,the scenic spots are worth to see too.For example,LongTing and QingMingShangHeYuan, so on.The dynasty of Song was chosen a site for the capital in KaiFeng ever before.So,this experience would be full with culture of Song Dynasty.Sounds wonderful. A well-organized plan is successful.My foreign friend of Lucy,I present a very hot-hearted to you.See you next time.